I was going through some of my journal entries, and found pages, where I deeply criticized my body. Some pages from last summer made me stop and reflect on how hard I was on myself, the high expectations I had for myself that made me…well, concerned.
I began trying to think back to a time where I was truly happy with my body. Sadly, there were a few. Even in small moments when I would appreciate something about my body, my focus would quickly shift to the things that did not please me. I do that a lot, and I think it’s safe to say that unfortunately I am not the only girl (or actually person-because body image issues I found happen across all genders) to feel this way. I have been trying to understand where this pressure I have put on myself to have the perfect body comes from. The constant comparison of myself with others, the pressure from media outlets pushing a specific certain type of people as “beautiful”, the pressure from myself not allowing me to be satisfied with who I am because I’m not where I’m supposed to be. Also, “What is the perfect body anyway?”
Apart from choices made to improve my nutrition to include healthier options for my overall health, this obsession over obtaining the perfect body has not brought me anything but negative thoughts that promote negative thoughts rather than self-love. I cannot be kind to others, I cannot teach my younger sister to be love herself and be confident if I’m unkind to parts of myself. Yes it’s important to be critical of yourself to promote growth but that does not mean being negative about yourself.
I have been negative about myself, particularly my body. I’m starting to forgive myself for that and choosing to encourage myself (& others) to prioritize being in good health, and make sure that whatever actions we take for our bodies comes from a place of love, kindness and understanding.
Book of the month: Les Miserables by Victor Hugo
Inspirational video: TEDx Talk “Power of vulnerability” Brene Brown https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_on_vulnerability